So I'm going through a phase. Some might call it a lifestyle, but I'm clearly not that consistent in life, so I won't even place that kind of pressure on myself. I've tried this phase before, and it last approximately a day and a half. Not exactly what I'd call a life altering decision. But I've done it again. And believe it or not, and most won't, I've been steadfast in my endeavor so far. For two weeks now…..or is it three? Anyway, I've made a decision. Decision made. I am….dun dun dun (that would be the stellar cinematic sound effect most hear on television or movies but you're lucky enough to hear/read/imagine it through the art of text)…… a vegetarian!
WHAT??? Who does that?? Ya know, I contemplated for a while about this (roughly 37 seconds or so). Like I said, I have attempted to go down this path before, but was quickly re-routed back to my old meat devouring days. So what do you ask, showing my proven record of failure in this department, would make me want to go down this chicken and cowless road again? The answer = I don't know. Honestly. But I weighed the pros & cons. And here's the marathonal list I came up with:
Pros:
1. I have great healthness that enters my body with each lettuce & carrot filled bite.
2. Veggie meals aren't as filling as meaty ones. That means MORE food for me!! Can I get a WHOOP WHOOP??
3. Ferdinand doesn't have to stress about me at Christmas & Thanksgiving so much that the unfortunate fellow starves himself and flees Hoggett's sheep farm.
4. Nobody said Snickers and potato chips were off limits. Can I get another WHOOP WHOOP??
Cons:
1. My ag-student/meat-eatin'/animal ranchin'/meatatarian sister hates me and yells loud noises in my general direction every veggie moment of mine she gets.
2. In Treehouse of Horror XI, Homer Simpson is killed by eating broccoli. Keep me in your prayers.
3. I'll be THAT girl who only eats side dishes. Ugh. You know…..THAT girl.
4. They say you are what you eat. And really? Who wants to be a nut or a fruit?
Okay, so my cataloged why and wherefores might not be the most outstanding. But I've done it. I may not know why, but I'm committing myself. Go big or go home. I have to at least give this phase a decent showing. It wouldn't be fair to Ferdinand otherwise. (This would be my second reference to the movie 'Babe', for those of you keeping up. I love that crazy ass duck.)
Though I must say, I've come across some rather delicious alternatives to meaty meat meat foods. (And yes, I said "meaty meat meat" on purpose. I like how it sounds). One hamburger I had tasted like a scrumptious burrito!! If that isn't irony at it's finest, I don't know what is. And it was exciting to eat, because prior to entering your mouth, the tastebuds are screaming for hamburger, but wait!! Instead they receive the dreamy flavor of late night Taco Bell! It just keeps those taste buds a-guessin'!
Feel free to join the veg-head bandwagon with me. Maybe then I won't fall off it so easily if I have some compadres with me. VEG 4 LIFE!!
