Sunday, August 31, 2014

Happy Sunday!

Romans 15:5

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Thursday, August 21, 2014

3 Feet --- It's the Law

So I decided to take an excerpt from an old post of mine and repost it. There have been a scary number of cyclist killed and/or injured over the past months, and I wanted to share with you fine people the time I was almost a cyclist killer.
(Killer by association, really.)
(I wasn't driving, so it wouldn't have been my fault.)
(But I was in the car, so that makes me partly guilty, right??)
(This is where you shake your head and say, "Of course, not. You're innocent.)
(Thank you.)

So, a little background info...

My husband's a cyclist.
(We're talking hard-core. Like a spandex-wearing, Pre-Doping-Charges-Lance-Armstrong-Lovin' type of cyclist.)
(Y'all, he'll sit on his bike and ride it for 6 or 7 hours straight.)
(And pedal the whole time.)
(Have I mentioned he's crazy?)

Last year, on our trip to California, myself and the other vacationing Real Housewives of Memphis Cycling went on a tour of the Santa Barbara vineyards while our husbands rode in a century ride through the Santa Ynez Valley. Initially, we considered ourselves smart to have gotten a car and driver so we could drink ourselves stupid enjoy a little wine tasting. But we were wrong. 

Anyway, so here's what happened. 

Don't let this happen to you.

Don't be a cyclist killer.

Cause it could be my husband.

And then I would be a blog-reader killer. 
(That would be you.)
(And I'd hate to have to do that.)


~~~~~ Santa Ynez Valley, March 2013~~~~~

We had some drama on our winery day. What could have been MAJOR drama, was (thank God) only minor drama.

So our husbands took part in a massive century ride going on all throughout SB County that day. Cyclists were everywhere. In town, out of town... everywhere. Well, it turns out our driver had NO REGARD for cyclists WHATSOEVER! 

Seriously.

It's almost like he didn't even see them. Which is impossible, because, as I just mentioned, 
They. Were. Everywhere.

Not an exaggeration. 

So you can imagine our surprise and terror when our driver came within inches of plowing a cyclist over because he decided to pull out of the parking lot RIGHT IN FRONT OF this guy, careening down the 2 lane road on his bike, at no less than 25 miles an hour.

Y'all. I'm talking INCHES. The cyclist had to swerve into the other lane (of on-coming traffic) and then proceeded to throw up a couple well-deserved fingers in our direction.

THEN, our driver decided to motor past other groups of cyclists at break-neck speeds, almost hitting at least 5-10 others.

Now y'all... I've been known to exaggerate stories every once in a while for the sake of dramatics and theatrics... but for real....

OUR DRIVER ALMOST KILLED LIKE FIVE HUNDRED AND SIXTY SEVEN BILLION CYCLISTS!!!

All within fifteen minutes of each other.

And he had a load of CYCLING WIVES in the car with him!!

(CAN YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING THIS STORY AT YOU?? MY CAPS LOCK ISN'T DOING MY FRAZZLED EMOTIONS JUSTICE RIGHT NOW!!!)

I mean, our husbands were out RIDING right AT THAT moment!! On the roads this guy was attempting murder on!!

While all of this happened, let me show you what was happening inside the vehicle...
Myself, Janice, and Georgette quickly ducked our heads and refused to look. 
(Yeah, I know... shameful. I'm thoroughly surprised this was my instinctive reaction. I'm normally a pretty vocal passenger... okay, or just vocal in general... Whatever.)

Molly braced herself from sliding around the back seat while we swerved back and forth across double yellow lines into oncoming traffic.

Rebecca screeched from the backseat, "There's another one!!!! Oh my GOD!!!"

And Ruth, also busy hanging on for dear life, politely yelled in her sweet southern accent, "Sir... Sir.... SIR!!!  There's another one right there! THEY HAVE THE RIGHT AWAY, SIR!! Treat them like another vehicle! SIR!!!!!"

After we successfully almost killed the 567 billionth cyclist, the driver then had the gall to complain to us how irritating cyclists were, blah, blah, blah...

Alright, let's pause this story and take a quick breather.

I understand not everybody is lucky enough to live with a cyclist, like I am. So there may be some confusion regarding the issue of cyclists on the road. So, this is a very short and condensed version of how to obey traffic laws in reference to cyclists.
If you are driving and see a cyclist by LAW you must treat them like another vehicle....because technically - they ARE. 
When passing a cyclist, you must give a minimum of 3 feet between you and them.  
If they are in front of you.... THEY HAVE THE RIGHT AWAY.
Anyway, the driver eventually shut the #&(% up when he dropped us off for lunch and sped away.
(In his defense, he may have been drinking, as well.)
(Because drinking and driving makes it okay, right?)
(No, but really. His driving, even when there weren't any cyclists around was pretty bad and it got progressively worse as the day, and the vineyards, wore on...)
(So maybe he's not always a d-bag driver?? It could have just been the alcohol? Maybe?? Bueller?)

However, we DIDN'T shut up about what a complete moron he was. We ended up calling the driving company and demanded a new driver and may have told the owner of the company that Cyclist-Killer may have been drinking.

Luckily, a new driver picked us up after lunch and he was much better. We were then able to relax and enjoy the rest of the wineries we visited.
(This new driver probably knew we were pissed and had slightly higher levels of intoxication.)
(And being the smart man he was, he decided to just nod and smile at everything we said.)

Whew.... that was a day.

*To all the cyclists who rode in the Santa Barbara Century ride last March.... 
I sincerely apologize for the black Lincoln Navigator that decided it might be fun to buzz your tower over and over again. He was reported.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Run Like You Stole It... Or Not.

So after Mother Nature's debacle that screwed up the whole 2013 St Jude Marathon Weekend, I've been pretty lackadaisical when it comes to running.

I've done it.
(Sort of.)

But haven't really set any goals or trained hard for anything. I'm pretty sure the full marathon training did me in.

Therefore, my base mileage and pace per mile has suffered since.

Oh, well.

But that's the cool thing about running.

You can always get better.
(In my case, only after you get worse, of course.)

At the 1st 2014 RRS 5K
I've run a couple 5K's here and there with some new running friends and my sister, and they've been fun. For the first time (in my life, really) I haven't been uber-competitive in pushing trying for new PRs and longer distances. I've taken it slow and easy. And it's been kind of nice.
(Weird, but nice.)

I did, however, register for the Road Race Series again.
(Why I do this to myself every year, I don't know.)

I ran the first 5K with one of my friends, who, by-the-way, got a P.R.! Whoop! Unfortunately, during the second 5K, Bryant was out of town (at his own race. I tend to draw the short straw when it comes to racing in our household.), and there was nobody to watch the kids. Normally, I would get a babysitter, but they tend to be few and far between on Sundays at 7am.

But hopefully, I'll be able to run the next one.

So maybe by the end of this series, I'll have a couple more half marathons under my belt. And maybe by then I'll get the competitive streak back.


Sunday, August 17, 2014

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Books, Books, Books!

For mine and Bryant's eight year (EIGHT YEARS, Y'ALL!) anniversary, I received a Kindle.
(And Bryant received a card. I'm such a good wife.)
(Hey, whatever. It was hand written and required effort.)

The Kindle has stepped up my reading game, considerably. My goal for the year was to read 25 new books, but I'm pretty sure, I'll by-pass that with the Kindle. I'm also loving the Kindle Prime benefits! A free book every month?? Yes, please! 

Here are some of my bookshelves on Goodreads. (If you're on Goodreads, come find me!)


  • Currently Reading:
The Best Yes Study Guide
Writing with Stardust: The Ultimate Descriptive Guide for students, parents,teachers and lovers of English.










  • Want to Read:
Little Women
Persuasion
Seriously... I'm Kidding
Not a Fan: Becoming a Completely Committed Follower of Jesus
Grace (Eventually): Thoughts on Faith
The Last Seven Pages: Two Days to Live. What Would You Write? A Memoir of Hope
Sun Stand Still: What Happens When You Dare to Ask God for the Impossible
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life
Angry Conversations with God: A Snarky but Authentic Spiritual Memoir
One Lavender Ribbon






















Below are some of the books I've read this year. And yes, I would recommend any and all of these!

(Except maybe "Keeping Faith" with Jodi Picoult (whom I luuuuuuuvve normally!)... the ending sucked and nothing came of it. Totally dumb ending. Sorry, Jodi - it's true.)

My favs from the list are (in no particular order):

  • The Timekeeper
  • Hyperbole & a Half
  • The Pact
  • The Book Thief
  • Both Melanie Shankle books - "The Antelope in the Living Room" and "Sparkling Green Earrings"

  • Books Read in 2014
    • How to Write Seductive Web Copy by Henneke Duistermaat
    • Keeping Faith by Jodi Picoult
    • The Antelope in the Living Room by Melanie Shankle
    • The Pact by Jodi Picoult
    • Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
    • Feathers from My Nest by Beth Moore
    • The Fault in Our Stars by John Green
    • The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
    • Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott
    • As Sure as the Dawn by Francine Rivers
    • The Time Keeper by Mitch Albom
    • Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh
    • Sparkly Green Earrings by Melanie Shankle
    • Killing Jesus by Bill O'Reilly
    • The Fasting Edge by Jentezen Franklin
    • Praying God's Word by Beth Moore

 What are you reading?? What do you recommend I add to my "To-Read" list??


Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Welcome to McKenna's Ice Castle

So, in case you've been living under a rock, I want to be the first to inform you, the Disney movie, Frozen, is all the rage.

I am Little kids everywhere are obsessed with Elsa, Anna, and Olaf...

(Not really with Sven or Kristoff... they're the lame supporting characters.)

(Sorry, but it's true.)

(But they're necessary characters, at least. However lame they may be.)

Anyway, my child reigns as Queen of the Frozen Fan Club. She has every line memorized, and we she sings the songs sporadically all day, everyday.

Here's a little taste....

Anyway, for her birthday in June, we had a Frozen themed party. It was a ton of fun for the kids. I gave MK the choice of having her party at a fun place (such as The Little Gym or some other crazy, little kid party location) for a gazilion dollars or having it at our house, and spending that gazillion dollars on decorations and a cool cake.

She chose the latter.

So, out the invitations went.
Invitation

And then onto OrientalTrading.com we went, and McKenna picked out all the decor.

Including Elsa and Anna, in the flesh cardboard.


When all the junk decor arrived, I made HER decorate. After all, it was her party.

And ladies and gentlemen, she may have a future in the decorating business. Seriously.
(Let's be real - this child gets excited when the new season's Pottery Barn catalog comes out and exclaims "NEW CURTAINS!" upon flipping to page 27.)
(Welcome to my life, people. I live with a middle-aged housewife, stuck in a 5 year old body.)

While McKenna set up the crystal trees, "icicles," tissue balls, and plethora of candy-filled vases (to which I say Your Welcome! to all the unsuspecting party-goer parents. No worries, free doses of insulin were passed out upon departure...), I printed out a number of free printables I found online (food labels, water bottle labels, framed printables, a banner, etc.) to add the finishing touches and voila! We turned our home into a Frozen tundra.



(I forgot to get a closeup pic of the food, so this was
was taken from the site I download the printables from)


 I'm pretty sure all of the kids had a blast.

(The parents, I'm not so sure.)



Not going to lie... I'm pretty proud of my HAND DRAWN Olaf, for Pin the Nose of Olaf.
(This is where the truth of my sub-par artistic skills is to be kept a secret from me. Please, and thank you.)



Well, the party was a success. 
(Nobody died and there was no blood shed, so yes - a success.)
(Though we may have had some severe insulin spikes.)

But I'm glad it's over. 

Until next year!


Sunday, August 10, 2014

Happy Sunday!

Psalm‬ ‭139‬:‭23-24‬



Thursday, August 7, 2014

School Days!

AHHH! I have a KINDERGARTENER.

I know that probably doesn't sound like much to most people, but y'all...

She was JUST BORN. Like yesterday.

Swear.

See? I have proof...

YESTERDAY:

TODAY:

And on her first day of school earlier this week, she was adamant on walking into school..

BY HERSELF.

(I had to demand to walk her in, pretending I had some really important questions for the teacher.)
(Not cool for my aching heart.)

As I walked out, leaving my newborn baby in a stranger's classroom, she. didn't. even. look. up.

Welcome to my life, people.



McKenna was so excited and had no issue posing with her sign 
in the front yard, before we left the house. 
(Typical)